Sleeping is for Losers: June 2012

Hey Now: Check Me Out!

I had a great opportunity to guest post on a great new site, Oshawa Mom Space.

Check it out!!! (and some cute pics of my kiddos too!)

http://oshawamomspace.wordpress.com/2012/06/30/guest-post-cachet-park-review/

How To Really Parent

This is floating around Facebook. And it's a necessary reminder of how to really parent your kids. And a necessary reminder that kids need to be...well...kids.

Stop yelling. Remember how really small they are. Encourage silly. (maybe even be silly yourself). Say YES. Just be there, mind body spirit, for your wee one. Because they are only wee for a short while.

Midweek Confession

The "I can't believe I'm putting this on the internet" edition

* I quit my job. (fyi- blogger changed 'quit' to 'quite'...I hate autocorrect!) GULP. I can't believe that I actually did it, but I've left teaching in its entirety. I think teaching is a fantastic profession, but I was commuting about 45 minutes each way, leaving the house before my kids were awake and picking them up from daycare just in time for dinner, a walk and sleep. I couldn't keep it up. I missed them so much and I wanted to be with them more than anything. So...

*I have a new job! An opportunity came my way while I was on maternity leave. An opportunity to be an EDITOR. To work with words all day is a dream come true. It has been a major learning curve as I entered an industry that I was quite unfamiliar with and have had to learn on the fly a lot. And I've made a lot of mistakes (WHICH I HATE!) and I've cried a few tears because the perfectionist in me wants to be...well...perfect. But I'm learning and growing and getting better (I think) and I am HOME 90% of the time. Working from home is incredibly difficult but seeing these faces all day = totally worth it!

* My red-headed 3 year old is very annoying. Really, I think it's this age, but he NEVER STOPS TALKING. AND BUGGING. AND PICKING. AND THEN TALKING SOME MORE. And, yes, I adore being at home with my babies, but I just want some quiet. So I would love for him to sit quietly, just every once in a while. And I want him to stop poking at his brother all the time and knocking him over for no particular reason. And I want the whining to stop when he doesn't get his own way. And I want him to tell the truth when I ask him a question, not make up some fantastical answer that shows off his (impressive) (but annoying) imagination. And I really want him to stop arguing with me about EVERYTHING because he's only THREE and (this will be a shock to him) he doesn't know everything!

* While writing this... my one year old is pulling up my shirt and blowing zerberts on my love handles. He's also pinching my fat. And making me consider that lipo/tummy tuck that I have been mulling over.

* We have a new SUV... that I can't park. I am crooked every time. Yesterday I pulled in and out of the same spot at least 5 times, in a pathetic attempt to park my car between the lines. By the time I gave up, I was taking up two parking spaces, with my bumper encroaching on a third. PATHETIC.

* I planned Will's First Birthday Party... to take place the weekend BEFORE my period. Two reasons: 1) I wouldn't look too bloated in the pics and 2) I would be in a semi-nice mood. Well, wouldn't my period decide to show up one week early... on the exact date of the party. Needless to say, hormonal, puffy mess was I.

Summer Reading List: REAL, GROWN-UP BOOKS!

Well, the time has come.

My baby is one and FINALLY sleeping through the night! (phew!)

I am sleeping through the night (mercifully!)

And I, although working part-time from home, will start reading again this summer.

Can. Not. Wait!

I have compiled a list of books I can't wait to read over this summer...

and hope to post reviews for each of them.

I've linked up to their Amazon page, if you're interested in reading an overview of each book (but it's of no financial benefit to me, fyi).

Join me?

The List

Room by Emma Donoghue

Sarah's Key by Tatiana de Rosnay

The Night Circus by Erin Morgenstern

Cutting For Stone by Abraham Verghese

Secret Daughter by Shilpi Gowda

Shout Her Lovely Name by Natalie Serber (short story collection)

But my list is certainly not complete. And I'm taking suggestions ...
What is on your MUST READ list this summer?

Blogging Is The New Black: Where Can Blogging Take You?

aka: is blogging really worth it

Before I even start, let me say that if you begin blogging because you are interested in making money or gaining notoriety, STOP. The chances of you becoming a 'mega blogger' who is raking in the dough are slim. The chances of you becoming an expert on tv, a go-to for newspapers, or writing a column for a magazine are slim. The chances of blogging becoming your full time job are very slim. It CAN happen, but I want to be realistic with you. There are very few 'mega bloggers' out there, for good reason. WRITE a blog because you have something to say or something to put out there...the rest will fall into place if it's meant to be.

That being said, blogging can bring AMAZING opportunities into your life, and that's what I want to focus on here. Where can blogging take you and what can you gain out of it? I thought I'd share some of my experiences with you:

1. Regular Contributor- For a few years, I had the fantastic opportunity of being a regular writer for Urbanmoms.ca. This site opened me up to a Canada-wide audience and also helped me focus my particular writing style. I was trapped in a cycle of reading 'major' bloggers and trying to emulate them, instead of just being myself. Writing for UrbanMoms provided me with the platform I needed to see what really worked with readers and what didn't ring true. Granted, everyone has their own opinion and your writing will never resonate with everyone, but this national writing opportunity was one that I will forever be grateful for. How did I get it? I wrote a guest post for UrbanMoms that was well received. As they were growing and adding new bloggers at that time, the founder asked me if I would consider writing a blog from a new mom perspective. The rest is history. Something to be said for right time, right place! One should know, however, that a regular contributor is often required to post a certain amount each week, and generally has 'guidelines' (some strict, some loose, depending on the site) to follow for their contributions. If you can get a regular contributor gig on a site you love (like I did with UrbanMoms), consider yourself VERY lucky!

2. Ghost Writer- I am a blog 'ghost writer'. I write blog posts for a few small business, some on a regular basis. I obviously cannot divulge which business I write for (not very ghosty!) but it has been a great experience for me. Although you can't take credit for what you write, there is something very satisfying about assisting a company in growing its social media presence. How did I get it? I was approached by a small business in the fitness industry who was looking to improve their social media presence. I had taken one of their classes and they had read my blog (I put my blog link at the bottom of all my personal emails- good thing to do as you never know who will read it!). From there, I have worked with a photography company and a few mom spaces. I don't advertise but rely on word of mouth.

3. Freelance Writer- Just because you blog does not mean you can write an article. I learned this the hard way. Throughout high school and university, I did some freelance work but had stopped when I started teaching full time. Once my blog gained a bit of momentum, I thought it was time to take my writing skills to the magazine/newspaper market. There are a plethora of smaller publications that rely on freelance writers to make up their content- especially in the parenting arena. It is not for the faint of heart though, and these small publications often have very young and inexperienced editors that can be hard to work with at times. Steady yourself and be willing to take criticism and you can really succeed. Remember, though, that the payment you receive for these articles is often quite nominal and you should focus on the experience that this freelance writing provides you, not the money you receive! How did I get it? I queried a local parenting magazine that is published monthly. I had an idea for a story, pitched it, and was given the green light to write it! That being said, when I was pregnant with William, I all but stopped writing as life majorly kicked my butt. Re-establishing contacts in the freelance world is HARD WORK, so I suggest that you not follow my lead in this regard. Always stay in touch with editors! Remember that you will likely be rejected quite a bit before you get any opportunities, so be prepared to persevere!

4. Advertising and/or Sponsored Posts- This is the way a lot of bloggers make their money, albeit a small amount. Should you reach a certain level with your blog, or fill a specific niche, selling advertising or writing sponsored posts (where you receive product/money in exchange for a review) is generally the next step. Not only does it generate income- anywhere from $25 to $200 a month, on average- it often gives the appearance that your blog is well read and well liked. How did I get it? I do not have advertising on my blog yet. This has been a personal choice. However, I have started to be approached as my blog numbers have grown and am considering the addition of advertising. That being said, I know many fantastic bloggers that sell advertising by approaching local business that fit into their niche and have had great success with this. I will occasionally do sponsored posts through PTPA Media or Mom Central. I am VERY CAREFUL that the advertising I do endorse is realistic. If I do not like a product or had a bad experience, I generally do not feature it or at the try least give the advertiser/sponsor a head-up. I'm not interesting in pimping my blog out to the highest bidder.

5. Partnership- Occasionally, a blogger will have the opportunity to partner with a larger blog, a site, or even a corporate sponsor. This is always an exciting venture as it allows you to work with someone who has a larger reach than you do, but generally allows you to maintain content control. How did I get it? After being chosen as a Circle Of Moms Top 25 Blogger, I received quite a few partnership offers, but the one I took up was with Savvymom.ca, which allows me to upload posts to their SavvyStories. It has generated great traffic for this site. It differs from being a 'regular contributor' as I only upload posts of my choosing, when I choose to do it. Obviously the more often you contribute the better, but if I don't blog for a week it's not a big deal! I don't always get paid for partnerships, but I think their value outweighs the potential money to be earned.

There are countless other ways that blogging can bring you financial gains (no matter how small) and/or success in other areas. Community managers, product tester, conference facilitator/speaker, travel writer, etc. Blogging opens doors. Sometimes you really have to work for those doors to be opened. Sometimes they open without so much as a knock from you. The key, in my very limited and humble experience, is to say YES to opportunities, to work for little to nothing just to get your name out there (but put in as much effort as you would if you were working for $1,000), and to LOVE what you do. It takes time to build a readership, time to find your niche, and time to find your voice.

ROAD TRIP: Florida Fotos

(just a smattering of the photos we took in Florida...)

Water baby

Volcano making at its best

Beach bums

Pool.

Haters gonna hate...

Essential DVD watching in progress.

Tennessee

Naps on the beach. Castles in the sand. Living the life.

TEEEENYYYY TINNY CRAWBS (as Zach calls them)

Ridin' We got asked if they were twins numerous times...um, ok then.

ROAD TRIP: Those Special Moments

While we were away, this boy

and I shared many special moments and lots of chatting time.

One morning, as I was making coffee, I heard him rustling in his bed. I peeked my head in and he whispered "will you come lie down with me". Heart melts.

We snuggled up and it was silent for a beat. Then he turned to me and whispered,

"Mommy, you smell like stinky cream cheese and daddy toots."

Moment=over

ROAD TRIP: The Highlights

I love a good road trip. Always have.
Our road trip to Florida from Toronto took us through six States:
Michigan, Ohio, Kentucky, Tennessee, Georgia and Florida. I have been to Florida; but the rest of the States we drove through were foreign to me. So here are some of my thoughts and highlights:

I am the only one who thinks it's awesome to play "Lose Yourself" by Eminem while driving past 8 Mile in Detroit. Come ON! As if that's not the perfect song!
My road trip theme song (Party In The USA!) was vetoed
"Call Me Maybe" became the road trip theme song by default because it is on the radio every single moment of the day. And we all know the words. (well, not William, but he would yell and kick his feet when it came on).
My husband totally loves One Direction.
There is no need for a pillow in the car. It's just annoying and doesn't get used.
Pull-ups=awesome for the three year old who couldn't hold it one time.
The States really does have a lot of stuff we can't get in Canada. We guzzled Cherry Coke and Sweet Tea, chowed down on Cookie Crisp and Trix, ate so many containers of Chobani yogurt (although I think it is starting to become available in Canada), and stocked our fridge with B&J Fuzzy Navel. I am so jealous that Americans get to enjoy these treats every day.
Many restaurants in the States do not carry anything but pop (soda??). My kids don't drink pop- that's my personal choice. However, I cannot tell you how many times we were at a restaurant that served nothing but soda or alcohol, which means that Zach got a taste of the good stuff on one occasion. Hooked much?
Apparently, pop at breakfast is perfectly acceptable. This is totally judgey HOWEVER I just cannot see the need to drink a Mountain Dew at 7:00 a.m.
I love me a Southern Accent. Z loves them too. I loved hearing people talk to me in Georgia and Kentucky. I loved when they asked if I was "from the North" because of how I talked. I loved that everyone called me sweetie and cooed over my boys. I just don't get that in Toronto.
I love me some McDonalds. Good thing too, because we ate more McDs than anything else.
People on the beach in Ft. Myers were grossly tanned. Like, SOOOO over the top.
I am the whitest human on Earth. So is Zach. We are sooooo white.
SPF 60 works.
It is HOT in the South. Like HOOOOOOTTTTTT! I was wearing jeans when we stopped in Kentucky and pretty much melted.
The "wildlife" in the south (lizards, crabs, etc.) was amazing to my 3 year old. He adored searching for those little creatures.
You can buy alcohol everywhere. I forgot that. It's so convenient.
The terrain of Tennessee is amazing. The mountains blew my mind.
Apparently, TEXAS is not on the way to Florida when driving from Toronto...contrary to what I believed.
Downtown Detroit is scary. LEGIT scary.
Gas station bathrooms=scary. LEGIT!
Crossing the boarder is much faster and easier then I anticipated.
Sometimes, my kids sleep.

ROAD TRIP!!!

(aka: how to survive a four day road trip with a 3 year old and 1 year old and your spouse. And live to tell the tale)

Our family vacation to Florida was very carefully planned. But I did not spend more time on anything than planning the 'car time' that the drive from Toronto to Florida (and then Florida to Toronto) would provide us with.

There are a lot of good ideas on the internet regarding road tripping with kids but I'll tell you that few of those ideas pertain to kids as young as mine. I will assume this is because no one is stupid enough to spend four full days in the car with little kids. But I am. So here are my tips:

Pack a PLETHORA of {healthy-ish} snacks:

Snacks are a must. But you must pack double the amount you think your family will need. Because boredom eating is not just for us stay-at-home moms, believe me. My one year old will eat double the amount I can when he is bored.

The key to road trip snacks for young children (and their parents) is to make them portable, easy to grab, and sure-fire crowd pleasers. And healthy. Trust me- you are going to need healthy snacks.

I headed out to our grocery store and got individual (snack sized) packs of baby carrots, sugar snap peas, and celery and dip. I rarely buy these items but it saved me so much time as they were pre-packaged and easily portable. I also added some apples, a few bananas, grapes, cucumber slices (I cut those myself- someone please made those in snack size, ok??) and cheese strings. I think I threw a few drinking boxes in there as well.

I also used a cloth shopping bag for my 'non-perishable' snacks: boxes of crackers, teddy grahams, animal crackers, rice krispie squares, fruit snacks, etc. Anything that was easy to grab and munch on. The front seat of our car looked like a small convenience store, it was so packed with food, but by the time we reached our final destination, we had plowed through 3/4 of the snacks I had packed.

Pack a cooler:

In our trunk, we kept a larger cooler which was packed with the 'essentials' our kids need and love. Homogonized milk for Will, 2% milk for Zach. Peanut butter and whole wheat bread. Juice. Cereal. Pre-sliced apples (yes, seems needless & kinda costly, but having these apples all sliced and ready to eat was a lifesaver).

The key to the cooler was that it was easily accessible when we stopped at rest areas. Instead of paying for a fast food lunch we made peanut butter sandwiches and guzzled juice or milk and munched on crispy apple slices. It saved us so much time and a ton of money!

Stop. A. Lot.:

Listen, we had 24 hours of driving to do with a 3 year old, who is newly potty trained, and a 1 year old who only wants to walk. We took full advantage of the AMAZING road-side rest stops that the US had to offer. Every rest stop on the I-75 was well lit, the bathrooms were relatively clean, and there was always enough grassy space for the kids to run some of their energy out. We had a chance to grab a snack from our well packed cooler. And we got to see how hot it really was outside (FYI- it was HOOOOOTTTTT!). A 15-20 minute stop was enough to keep the kids going for 2 or 3 hours.

Book a hotel room in advance:

We were not interested in driving for 24 hours straight with the kids. So, we decided to stop just outside of Atlanta, Georgia for a stay overnight. We stayed at a Holiday Inn Express, which was FANTASTIC and included a delicious breakfast, which all four of us enjoyed thoroughly. But it was also fully booked. So, when travelling with (little) children, I strongly suggest you book your hotel room in advance. For the record, Z loved sleeping in a hotel more than anything else we did on the trip. He snuggled in with 4 pillows and we literally dragged him out of bed, crying. He has NEVER loved sleeping like that. Major tip: Pack an overnight bag for your hotel stay. PJ's, toiletries, clothes for the next day. It will save you MAJOR headaches!

Pack toys they'll actually play with:

My boys love toy dinosaurs and they love books. That's what I packed for the car ride. Whining or tears? Have a dino. Grizzling starts...here's a book. Blankies and Marvin the Martian were staples in the back seat, along with the real life saver...

PORTABLE DVD PLAYER:

We have a portable dvd player with two screens that attach to the headrests. This saved our lives. Literally. They watched Madagascar, Ice Age (two different ones), episodes of Sesame Street and Chugginton, The Wiggles, Raffi (oh Raffi, how I love you). Although most of the movies were aimed at Zach, William enjoyed them just as much and was lulled to sleep by the glow of the dvd player more times than I can count.

Push. But not TOO far.:

Be ambitious in how far you want to drive in one day, but don't reach too far. The last few hours of our first day of driving were really difficult. We were arguing and there was crying and missed exits. We had just pushed too far and really should have stopped a bit earlier. Which brings me to my last point...

Make the car ride part of the fun:

My boys had never been in the USA before. We loved talking about each State as we entered it and teaching Z the {few} facts we knew. We loved showing him palm trees for the first time. And drinking sweet tea. And talking about accents. And showing him the mountains of Tennessee. It was fun (sometimes) and a good learning experience for all of us!

We Drove To Florida...

One week ago:

This guy:

This girl:

This 3 year old:

And this {almost} one year old...

Headed off on a two day road trip to Ft. Myers, Florida.

It was hard to decide what we wanted to do, as a family of four, for our first family vacation. In the end, due to finances and the ages of our boys, the idea of driving to Florida (from Toronto) and renting a condo right by the beach was the best idea. It allowed us to still live our "normal" life (normal= semi regular naps for the baby, pretty "normal" meals, a bathroom nearby for the 3 year old, etc.) but provided us a way to escape the distractions that a stay-cation would have bombarded us with.

Truthfully, there is no such thing as "relaxing" when you have two kids this young. I was still cooking and cleaning and dealing with meltdowns and fights and 'accidents' and demands. I was still changing diapers and glued to the couch at the end of the day because *apparently* it's frowned upon to go out to a bar and party it up while your children sleep at home. Heh. But being far away from our home and our family and our jobs and our friends gave us the opportunity to just be together with our kids. And that, my friends, was the real highlight of our trip (that, and the discovery of Whale Wars, which we cannot get enough of!).

I'll be posting a lot more of our trip but for now, know that this happened a lot...